Ok, off to a slow start... I'm s'pose to be ranting but tonight I'm feelin' more contemplative..
So as most of you who don't live in Afghanistan know: I just put a ring on a finger. Felt so right. Known this gal since August of 2009. First time I met her (at Bender's Bar) I had a Brooks saddle (leather bicycle saddle) in my back pocket. I was wearing a shirt that said: "Overworked and Underfucked." ...and we talked. I was intrigued. And the second time she came in to the bar, looked at me, and ordered a drink....I was fucking hooked. Line and sinker. Never another that came close. Sparkling eyes, dimples, astounding wit....And for 3 years I've been adoring this amazing person, and am so happy to say that I can now call her my fiance.
Yep. You can do it Kevin. It's all a matter of deciding your next move, deciding who you are and who you aren't, deciding what from your past you will let define you and what you toss out the window, deciding if you will create an ever-evolving success-definition for yourself and live by it, or if you will just stick to the tried-and-true self-sabotaging behaviors/goals/agendas of your life up to now. Everyone has to go at their own pace, obviously, and everyone has different aspects of themselves that they've already mastered which may clash with stuff you're just learning now, and vice-versa. Seems like that's why there's so much conflict / misunderstanding out there...you see people, what they're doing, and you don't get why they do certain things...then you sorta write them off without opening your mind to that. (Not you personally, the ubiquitous "you"). Why do you write them off, well, because if your mind isn't open to all possibilities life has to offer, well, you sorta HAVE to write them off at least in your mind, in order to just bring your attention back to yourself and your own life. But if a person is in a place where they can let go of the emotions that keep their walls in place, then suddenly new worlds can and do open up. And yet you can't force others to get to "that place". I wonder sometimes if maybe part of the essence of LUUUV is to master that trick, the one where you just accept that....
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